whats reality of life? life is not beautiful as my dream is. life is struggle. life is adventure. life is how we live it. pessimism wreathing my body, wondering whats life and how i should live it. i need a person to be true to me, to tell me whats life. no. maybe a person who makes my life complete. im living an incomplete life. my soul is empty, my body is dirty. dirty with all the sin i've commited. i've tried to express myself. i've tried to find whats the point of my life.
the loneliness. the feeling of being such a waste. useless. and then, i realize something. life is not dream. but life is way more better than dream. depends. depend on how we live our life. how we live our life? how i live my life? im living people expectation. i know. i know. expectation leads to disappointment. but what can i do if the person who expecting me is my own mom? i cant disappoint my mom. i cant. i wont. i wouldnt. but in the end, i'll disappoint her. my dad passed away six years ago. so now, i've no option. i live my mom expectation. thats how i live my life. thats reality of my life.
powered by experience. past, yesterday. today is a thrilling day, and tomorrow is never promised. future too. so whats bright future when tomorrow for us is never promised? so i've decide to be a realist. i'll never stop expecting. i'll never stop regretting. i'll never stop living, unless i die. when i die, i hope i'll left a mark in this world. a contribution. thats all. thanks for reading, dear my non existing readers. goodbye halcyon days.
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